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Notes form the Boonies

By Paul Wisovaty

This column is going to speak to racial and ethnic stereotyping, which of course is a component – I suppose a precondition – for racism. The immediate subject is "Chief Illiniwek," the departed and far-too-lamented mascot of the University of Illinois.

The University Trustees recently retired him, citing NCAA pressure, and in the process ducking what most of us would call the real moral issue. This is my take only, but I've always thought that if the white man wants to dress up someone to dance at halftime, he should pick a white guy and leave the red man the hell alone. It's more than a little hypocritical – and as I see it quite cruel – to pretend to honor Native Americans when we've spent the last 400 years keeping them down.

Throw in the probability that 90% of the fans at UI halftime ceremonies don't know, or care, anything about Native American culture, and you may understand what I'm trying to say. Unfortunately, if you read the letters to the editor in the Champaign paper, and certainly if you belly up to the bar at the Tuscola Moose Lodge, you will conclude that I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.

I often don't, although I'm pretty comfortable with my position on this one. But back to stereotyping. I should go on record at this point to state that I have never taken a course in anthropology or sociology, which means that there is no danger than I will let the facts get in my way. But here's my concern. If you line up every single "Chief" supporter, which means a clear majority of alumni and current students, and you hook them up to a polygraph, I am confident that I know what would happen. The question would be, "Should anyone find "Chief Illiniwek" to be offensive to Native Americans?

"They would all answer "No," and the line wouldn't move. And I'm not just referring to my buddies at the Moose Lodge, who really believe that Ronald Reagan was decorated at the Battle of the Bulge. A lot of really intelligent and educated people are appalled that a few of us liberal do-gooders – they do not tire of reminding us of our minority status – just don't Get It. And there's a kicker. I have had multiple conversations with these folks, and most of them are really nice people. As the prophet J. Buffet once observed, "Some things are still a mystery to me, while others are much too clear."

As you may have noticed, I'm kind of mystified by stereotyping, and with intolerance in general. But of course I'm as guilty of it as the next person. I'm 6'2", and I have never been real comfortable with people five feet tall, and less so with people 6'6". As a White Sox fan, I have an immediate distrust of Cubs fans. I drive a 1992 Pontiac, and distrust anyone who feels the need to buy a new car every two years. If I felt the need to buy a new car every two years, I am confident that I would dislike people who continue to drive 15-year-old cars. Does this make any sense? Well, either it makes no sense at all, or else it makes perfect sense. Please refer to the prophet Buffet.

As long as I'm suggesting that my hands are not clean, I'll mea culpa a little further. During my tour in Nam, I doubt that I ever once referred to the indigenous population as "Vietnamese." If you served, you know what I'm saying. I suppose that was explainable, if not justifiable: if we didn't think of them as real people, it made it a lot easier to kill them. Nothing beats great memories of Vietnam, right, guys?

With regard to the "Chief," I have to admit that, during my college days at Illinois, I was among his biggest supporters. I would have echoed every single "Chief" apologist today. I guess I'd like to think that the difference is that I've finally grown up. I just wish that my alma mater, and my fellow alums, would do the same.

Finally, I'd suggest that if you'd said, twenty or thirty years ago, that "Chief Illiniwek" was offensive to Native Americans and should be put out to pasture, you'd have been laughed at. Actually, you'd have been fortunate to have received that response. Those who took that position in earlier years were often subjected to serious derision, and that's probably putting a good face on it. But it's 2007, and he's gone, which leaves us with the bad news and the good news. The bad news is that way too many really nice people don't understand that people, and cultures, are not put on Earth just to make our lives more entertaining. The good news is that that message is finally getting through, and that maybe, ten or fifteen years from now, most people will begin to understand that.

If I'd had the humanity to have understood it forty years ago, I would have called them Vietnamese.