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Fraggin'

By Bill Shunas

Sp 5 Willy (Ret.)

Got a letter from a reader of THE VETERAN wanting to know why "Fraggin'" wasn't in the last issue. I'm sorry. I just went out about a klick, put my gear down, lit a "j" and cooled for awhile

Did you ever hear of Andrei Sakharov. He's one of these Russian dissidents who's been sent to exile in a place called Gorky because he's been speaking out for human rights in that country. Recently there was a celebration honoring Sakharov's 60th birthday in New York. Ronald Reagan sent a telegram to the participants praising Sakharov. Among other things, Reagan said "Mr. Sakharov is a Russian patriot in the best sense of the word because he perceived his peoples' greatness to be not in militarism and conquests abroad, but in building a free and lawful society at home."

Nice. Huh? If that's what a patriot is, I wish to hell that Reagan was one.

Instead, Reagan is going around promoting militarism and increasing the defense budget. They're even bringing battleships out of mothballs. For $326 million they converted the New Jersey from a too slow, obsolete World War II battleship to a too slow, obsolete World War II battleship. It serves the purpose though. It's a military showpiece with all the latest electronic gimmicks and missiles. They held a gala grand opening with red, white and blue covering it from stem to stern. Ronnie was there. He was positively blubbering with excitement. "I have the feeling," he said, "that I'm back on the set of filming "Hellcats of the navy."

All I can say is that I'm glad he didn't get the part in "Dr. Strangelove!"

Having an actor in the White House is not so bad. That's probably what Paul Laxalt, the Republican National Chairman thinks. As an answer to unemployment he wants Reagan to go on TV to promote American-made cars, washers and refrigerators. It would sort of be like the old days when Ronnie sold appliances as host of the General Electric Theatre.

I think a better answer to unemployment would be to stop building obsolete battleships and offensive weapons and put the money into building things that are needed. However, there is one part of the plan I like, and that is to put Reagan back where he belongs; on TV, preferably on the late, late show.

There's a new kind of protest going on at Offritt Air Base. Some religious people were objecting to the stained glass windows of the chapel of the Strategic Air Command. It seems that the stained glass contains images of radar equipment, fleets of bomber, a red "hotline" telephone, and yes, two mushroom clouds--as in clouds from atomic explosions.

A Dominican sister, a Dominican associate and a Sister of Mercy associate got dressed in sackcloth and ashes and staged a little protest demonstration at the SAC chapel. Of course SAC security had to save the chapel. They questioned and fingerprinted the dangerous suspects and banned them from returning to the base.

They should have locked them up and re-educated them. Told them that the mushroom cloud represented the shield of the 509th Bombardment Wing which dropped the A-bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. They should have explained to these people that God was behind us all the way on this thing. They could have been told that with a little imagination a mushroom could look like a cross, and we all have crosses to bear, don't we?

A Federal Trade Commission memorandum reported that cold water survival suits used by seamen are defective. The report also said that it would be cheaper to have widows and children sue for compensation than to recall the 66,000 suites.

Just think about this: they spend $326 million to refit the New Jersey. If it goes to war it will be too slow and probably get knocked out quickly. That means sailors will be in the ocean and won't survive because it costs too much to give them the right survival suit.

I guess the Navy doesn't always get the gravy. I wonder if Ronnie wore one of these suits when he filmed "Hellcats of the Navy."

GRENADE of the MONTH

Speaking of God and A-bombs, let's give this issue's "Grenade" to Defense Secretary Caspar Weinberger. He spoke to a group of Harvard students and told them that he believed the world was going to end by an act of God. He then continued to talk and promote his plans to wage a protracted nuclear war.

Maybe Caspar thinks he was send from God like the Angel Gabriel. He, St. Caspar, will do what he can to help carry out God's mission to end the world. And they wonder why grunts become atheists!